Life on Mars

Man, all of us alligators on Mars are just dreadfully bored this weekend. I don't know what it is. Maybe it's just that we know we're so pathetic not to have our own Olympics.

But what can we do? If we start Olympics now, we'll just be posers and fakers. Everyone would say, man China sure can put on an Olympics, but what the fuck with those lame Martians? What kind of opening ceremony was that?

And it's true. Everyone here on Mars is just lame and boring. I hate Mars. I'm going to take an Ambien and sleep away my lousy day.